Hours after my last class of the semester got out in San Francisco, I was stepping off the plane in Portland. My longtime friend and roommate, Mason, is from nearby Tigard, which is basically Portland but pretends it isn’t.

I had a blast running all over the “City of Roses” with Mason. I got to meet some of his friends, who I really think would fit in perfectly with my own crew back home and look forward to seeing again. Also, his family was about as gracious as hosts get.

Thursday

1. Flew into Portland
2. Met Mason’s family and his friends Donovan and Marcus
3. Hearty spaghetti dinner and birthday cake (belated celebration for Mason’s 21st)
4. Bannigan’s Pie House

Friday

1. Mason’s dad made breakfast
2. Walked around Washington Square Mall
3. A gallery/toys/lol place I wish I could remember the name of
4. Theo’s Sandwiches
5. A comic book shop I also can’t remember the name of
6. Saw MacGruber near Pioneer Courthouse
7. Mason’s dad made steak dinner

Saturday

1. Met up with my old pal Zach at Rocco’s Pizza
2. Powell’s Bookstore
3. Deschutes Brewery, then said bye to Zach
4. Met up with Marcus and headed to Saborro’s Sushi
5. Tea Chai Te
6. Joined by another guy named Jon on the way to Ground Kontrol Arcade Bar

Sunday

1. Elmer’s Diner
2. Saturday Market
3. Voodoo Donuts
4. Widmer Brewery
5. Max’s Brew Pub
6. Ordered from Pizza Caboose
7. Hung out with Donovan and Marcus

Monday

1. Another amazing breakfast made by Mason’s dad
2. Sushi Hana
3. House of Reptiles
4. Bounty Hunter Saloon
5. Bannigan’s Pie House again
6. Flew back to San Francisco

Portland was fantastic. It’s definitely on the list of places I can see myself living, and I can’t wait to go back again.

Without further delay, here are some of the lessons other people have taught me and other things I picked up from them.

Brent

• Introduced me to the Venture Brothers.
• Find out who needs help laughing and help them. Everybody will be happier. Surrounding yourself with happy people will make you happy. Doing this regularly will give you a happy life.
• Remember to be generous, even to the ungrateful and nonreciprocating (but more so to the grateful and nonreciprocating).

Chris Ramm

• Introduced me to good music, video games, fine art, movies, literature, and most other things. I’ve known him longer than anybody, so this was easy.
• Even if you know for certain that you will win doesn’t mean you have to fight.
• Trying to be different is just as mindless as trying to conform. Don’t worry about that stuff at all and you’ll be just fine, and plenty rebellious.
• If you suddenly find that your tastes or interests have changed, then move forward. It doesn’t have to be permanent, and it doesn’t have to be temporary either. You can go back anytime, too. Life is an adventure like that. Never be ashamed of changing tracks.
• Integrity means acting in accordance with your own beliefs just as much as not bowing down to other people’s beliefs. Sometimes this will mean upsetting others, no matter how gentle you really are.
• Loyalty is when love shows itself most clearly.

Christopher Villareal

• Brought me into the open source world and introduced me to most anime.
• Everybody wants a little respect and praise. Find a way to give it to them (but stay honest always). Tactfulness is 99% of everything.
• Working with others does not mean letting them walk over you. If others start to disrespect you, then don’t stick around and act childishly with them. Don’t wave attract attention to what happened, but don’t hide it either. Just have a spine and leave.
• Don’t deprive yourself because of vanity. If you think there’s something embarrassing about something you want to do, then have the self-discipline to set that aside and just go for it. Have fun, and in a counter-intuitive way, let the embarrassment add to the fun if possible.
• It’s okay to be shy, but don’t let it be a problem, and definitely don’t intentionally exacerbate it.

Collin

• Introduced me to computers as fun things to fiddle with (we even sang David Pogue songs together in 5th grade) and Dungeons & Dragons. Didn’t realize that so much of my geekiness stemmed from him until now. Thanks a lot, Collin.
• It can make perfect sense for somebody to be rational as well as spontaneous.
• It is irrational to live a life without spontaneity.
• You don’t lose your sentience and become an animal when you start feeling attracted to the opposite sex. It’s okay.

Eric

• Original partner in appreciation of giant robots. Introduced me to numerous sci-fi shows.
• Not all people with valid opinions have to debate a lot or carry on until they “win” when they do.
• When somebody is spouting nonsense, often it doesn’t deserve any response.

Justin

• Introduced me to Linux and is my original sushi buddy.
• Know where you really are on the ladder and act appropriately. Don’t present yourself as any more of an expert or novice than you are. Speak confidently when you know what you’re talking about, but try not to patronize.
• Don’t hold back praise for others when they do something you admire, and if somebody is looking up to you, then try to pull them up to your level without holding back.
• It is much wiser to view discussions as collaborations instead of conflicts. The only possible prize that anybody can leave with is to be liberated from fallacies they once had. Otherwise, you’re stuck with short-term pride and hurt feelings.

Kendra

• Introduced me to most of the ridiculous web memes that I know.
• Something’s enjoyability is absolutely irrelevant to its moral acceptability, so stop being judgmental and feeling guilty. Enjoy life.
• Being serious all the time isn’t good, smart, or fun.
• Sexuality is a spectrum, and a very big one. Acknowledging this doesn’t make you gay, bi, or anything. But it does make other people make more sense.

Krystal

• Introduced me to Coke Zero and rekindled my appreciation of double-bladed lightsabers.
• A glance and a pause is often all it takes to help somebody stop and put his or herself in your shoes and know exactly what you mean.
• Do not hold back how much you love your family.
• Allow yourself to be passionate about whatever interests you, but you don’t need to bounce off the walls.
• A bit of edginess is good for everybody. Root for the villain every once in a while.

Mark

• Introduced me to German-style board games.
• Being mindful of your own interests doesn’t mean you’re selfish. You can care about yourself and others at the same time, and if others try to get you to do things that are against your interest, then they’re the ones being selfish.
• Don’t worry about becoming a leader or follower. Instead, just focus on doing whatever it is that you want to actually do with people.

Mason

• Introduced me to evolutionary biology and atheism. (My old church would like a word with you.)
• Any analytical process that doesn’t consider other people’s feelings isn’t all that analytical.
• If you want happiness, help others be happy.
• Expertise does not justify arrogance.
• It is absolutely fine to walk around in your underwear in your own home every once in a while.

Nathan

• Introduced me to Mad Magazine and brownies. Yes, I had brownies before I started going over to his house, but understand that him sharing his mother’s brownies with me in elementary school made me a lifelong chocoholic.
• Don’t let anybody tell you that being more logical means having less heart or vice versa.
• You don’t always have to have an opinion at all. Remember that not everything matters. In fact, most things don’t.

Phil

• Introduced me to Starcraft (and then made me hate it later by kicking my ass at it) and rekindled my appreciation of football.
• Find out where your interests overlap with other people’s interests. Do not turn life into a zero-sum game.
• If you can set boundaries with people at the beginning without making them feel like boundaries, then you’ll be happier.

Ryan

• Introduced me to roller coasters that go upside-down (but I’m still sort of a wuss).
• Experiment. Be creative. Be playful. Enjoy life. Try not to worry about things that will stop you from doing those four things.
• If you are honest, then people will understand you and will probably like being with you.
• When you’re excited, let yourself be excited, and let others be excited with you. You’re as boring as you are foolish if you don’t.

Stephanie

• Introduced me to good music made after the year 1995 or so, a bunch of television shows, and the cardigan sweater.
• Having a sensitive or romantic mind is not pathetic or weak.
• I am not the only person on earth who empathizes and wants to help others.
• If you want to know somebody, start by finding out what they are proud of and don’t step on that if you don’t have to.
• Girls are not out to get me.

Steve

• Introduced me to beer (in moderation) and fashion (in moderation).
• Everything can be put on a number scale. It’s a great way of forcing yourself to assess how you feel about things.
• Being able to appreciate material things does not make you materialistic. Denying yourself any small happiness under the pretense of not being materialistic is just as externally dependent as being obsessed with things.
• Find out what other people’s goals are, and if you have any goals yourself, then don’t lose your focus on them.

If you weren’t on the list, then please don’t feel slighted. I didn’t do my parents either and they’d both have the most bullet points if I put them on here, so you’re in good company. Also, it’s 3:45 in the morning now.

So here’s a selfish list of random things I want to do, preferably with wonderful friends just like you.

This is very important.

1. Grill some steaks and/or have a Star Wars marathon.
2. Go ice skating in the temporary rink at the Hotel del Coronado.
3. Have a lazy picnic on a sailboat some afternoon, preferably with a piña colada and a bucket of chicken wings in addition to whatever else we decide to bring. (Don’t judge me, Mason. I still want more wings.)
4. Watch every remaining episode of Kitchen Nightmares.
5. See Sherlock Holmes.
6. See Avatar.
7. See Princess and the Frog.
8. Go to Knott’s Berry Farm.
9. Find a new coat.
10. Go to a Charger’s game.
11. Convince my dad to make his unbelievable rack of lamb one night.
12. Get down to Clayton’s for chocolate chip pancakes, and maybe some corned beef hash too.
13. Eat a bowl of Applejacks, just because it’s been like ten years since I’ve had a bowl and I was reminded of them recently.
14. Make cookies— from scratch for once. With lots of chocolate. And spices.
15. Spend a sunny day finding out how many cherry pits fit in my mouth.

Bonus: Shave my beard so I can see what I look like without one for the first time in years.

Also, I’ll post up the final versions of all the stuff I made for my design classes plus the video presentation I made for my art history class. But that can wait. Stuff from my narrative storytelling class is already up anyway.

Update: I uploaded the work to my Deviant Art. They wouldn’t take my video files though, so you can watch them here. Watch out, they play kinda fast. It feels that way especially because of chaotic camera movements, but hey, not bad for having used that particular program for only two weeks, right? I’m happy with all of them.

Winter Intercession
January 11 to 29

1. Art History Through the 19th Century – Monday through Friday, Online

I’m taking a class during the intercession to get more credits out of the way, and it’s going to be tough because it’s compressing a 15-week class into 3 weeks. To put it another way, that’s a 1-week module of art history per day, so I’m going to hate my life for a while but it should be over pretty quickly. And since it’s online, I can still come home at least.

Spring Semester
February 1 to May 22

1. General Psychology – Tuesday, 12:00-2:50 pm
2. Digital Design 1 – Tuesday, 3:30-6:20 pm
3. English Composition: Creative Persuasion – Wednesday, 12:00-2:50 pm
4. Digital Photography – Thursday, 12:00-2:50 pm

I’m at the point now where I’m starting to take electives, so I think my spring semester is going to be really enjoyable. I don’t think the workload will be super heavy like the semester I naively took Fundamentals of Graphic Design at the same time as Materials, Tools, and Comping Techniques. I might even join the swim team too.

From listening to my other friends, it seems like everybody is a little different with regards to what they’re attracted to, but I think my friends are more similar to each other than I am to them. I know what I like though, but I’m curious what others (guys and girls) think because, well, it’s an interesting topic, no?

Personality

I’m putting personality turn-ons first because they’re the biggest turn-ons for me. I don’t think that’s nearly as uncommon among men as some people think.

Here are some of the traits that I notice:

1. Playfulness! I want to be with somebody who knows how to be silly, fun, and carefree. Everybody should be able to let go when they’re around the people they love, especially their significant other.
2. Intelligence! You choose how to hold yourself, so don’t talk, act, dress, or otherwise present yourself as stupid. Talk confidently when you know what you’re talking about, and ask interesting questions when you don’t.
3. Not too chatty! Knowing how to talk and feeling the need to keep talking are two separate things. I’m socially comfortable, but I’m in my own head a lot. I’m best with people are like that too.
4. Some edgy interests! It doesn’t have to be much, but if you like horror movies or heavy metal, then don’t hide it. I like that stuff, and I don’t think other people find me freaky. Sure it’s possible to go too far, but that just means you’re for somebody else who is also “that far.”
5. Passionate! I care about stuff, and I feel like I can connect with people when I see them caring about stuff too. It’s good to be relaxed and down to earth most of the time, but it’s nice to see a little fire in the eyes every once in a while for a few things you really like even if they’re just little things you like a lot. I want to fall in love with the whole person, including the dark side. Again, it’s very easy to go too far with this one.

Physical

One of the things I realized that differentiated me from my friends was how we were physically attracted to girls and how that affected whether or not we decide to date a girl. Personality is important to all of us obviously, but they think that the guy has to immediately think the girl looks great or else the relationship will collapse. For me, instead of high physical attractiveness being a prerequisite, it’s more like high unattractiveness is a disqualifier. See the difference?

So I’m still human, and looks do affect how attracted I am, though I feel a little primal and vain for admitting it.

Here are some qualities that I notice.

1. Friendly, comforting face. You probably already picked up on how I get nervous with girls. But every once in a while, I’ll encounter a girl who just has something about her expression that puts me at ease like we’ve already been friends for a long time.
2. Sparkle in the eyes. Like a rascally, grinning kid about to pounce on an unsuspecting parent. Eyes are already nice in general which is why everybody always talks about them, but it’s that particular cunning, fierce glint that I really like, and not all eyes have it.
3. Subtle but unique expressions. I’m pretty good at reading people and apparently I’m easy to read myself, but some people naturally express themselves through tiny but noticeable tweaks in the corners of their mouths or squinted eyes. Not overly dramatic expressions though. The pureness of the expression should be matched by how private it is for the two of us. I like that.
4. Thin body. Heh, I feel even more primal and vain for admitting it, but yeah. Not unrealistically skinny or anorexic, but thin is nice. I like when girls look nimble. Maybe it’s connected to how I like when they can be playful.
5. Sophisticated, but a little daring too. I’m an artist, but I don’t think people should feel like they need to make excuses for being able to appreciate aesthetics. When people dress interestingly, pleasingly, and appropriately at the same time, we should be able to enjoy it for all of the same reasons as being able to enjoy anything else that looks nice. Relaxed outfits like jeans and a sweater are nice too, and “adorable” is always way better (and less scary) than “hot.

Post in the comments what you agree and disagree with, and if you think I missed something critical, say so.

About Katie’s Link

I’ve done all of the things listed in that ode, even the one about consoling somebody by helping them get rid of bothersome rumors by coming up with strategic counter-rumors. I’ve even let a friend use me by bringing me along to a party so they wouldn’t appear to their other friends as being alone or unwanted. And of course, I’ve done the more regular things too, like opening doors and listening to people’s inner struggles with something their boyfriend or “boyfriend candidate” did.

I like that I do those things, but it’s because I like the self-image of being a walking proof of my philosophies instead of just a head-in-the-clouds philosopher. Sure, it’s also partially because I like the self-image of being a “nice guy” in the way that dating sites talk about, but if that was the real motive, then I feel like that would be more of a mercenary niceness than an altruistic niceness, if you know what I mean. I enjoy doing these things, and I like that I am the person that I am.

Also, I don’t even think that those things necessarily describe a genuine nice guy anyway. I can think of several people who I wouldn’t really call the “nice guy” type who go through a lot of those motions. I wouldn’t necessarily go around saying that they were “not nice guys,” but that’s part of it right there. Where do you draw the line between being a likable, polite person and a genuine “nice guy” like what we’re talking about? What quality is it that lets one friendly, polite, and honest person make the bar but not another person who’d be described as friendly, polite, and honest?

Holding open doors, listening to people’s concerns, and even letting the people you love use you selfishly every once in a while sort of as a gift to them are actions. Robots can carry out all of those actions, but obviously they don’t get to be nice guys. Same with people who are routinely nice on the outside but jerks when you get to know them deeper down. So while actions certainly speak louder than words, actions by themselves are inconclusive. Motives matter, for starters.

I’ll put my cards on the table. Yes, I think of myself as a genuine nice guy. But that’s because of how I care for people, not because of how I step aside and smile when I see somebody else coming down the stairs I’m climbing. When I see tragedies on the television, I still get outraged and sad at the same time. When somebody says why they did something, I’m thinking about their intention as much as their result, seeing how it fits with my understanding of right and wrong, and expanding my understanding of right and wrong based on it. My friends can probably see a connection between these things and my politics and ethical beliefs.

That’s part of why I really do think I’m a genuine nice guy. I think about things that have to do with politics, ethics, jurisprudence, theology, and anything else even remotely connected to the idea of “I want to truly know what ‘good’ is because I care about ‘good’ and am drawn to it, and I like reflecting on my own nature so that I can become more and more naturally, reflexively, genuinely good.”

So the actions are a part of it, but feeling real empathy towards people is also critical, and so is a fascination with the struggle to be truly good.

And it all has to be perfectly altruistic, too. You can’t decide how to behave just because it will make other people happy (although the goal of making other people happy is noble and required). You also have to have convictions and behave in accordance with your philosophies even when it isn’t earning you the admiration of others. Sometimes, you’ll be completely misunderstood.

For example, something that bothers me personally is how people tell me sometimes that I come off as arrogant, condescending or a know-it-all. It’s hard to defend against that because so many people think that saying “I’m not arrogant!” is something only an arrogant person could say. I don’t open my mouth unless I know what I’m talking about, and as a result of that, some people only hear me speak confidently about the things I know about and conclude from this that I speak confidently about anything and everything. I wish they would get to know me better and I wish they didn’t think of me the way they do, but I’m not going to start purposely saying stupid things and then call attention to it try to try to balance out when I know what I’m talking about.

So there you go. I think Katie’s paper got a lot right about how nice guys act outwardly, but missed a lot of what’s going on inside them, which becomes more and more important as you get to know them.

About Kendra’s Link

First off, before anybody gets worried about me misunderstanding anything, don’t worry, because I don’t actually think Kendra is in full agreement with the paper she linked to. For all I know, she doesn’t agree or even sympathize with any of it, and she was just posting it to add another some perspective and extra to the conversation.

However, I’d guess that most girls who read what she posted will agree with at least some of what the writer was saying.

At the beginning of the piece, the author makes a point about bad logic.

I get letters from self-professed Nice Guys, complaining that women must WANT to be treated like shit, because THEY, the “Nice Guy” have failed repeatedly in relationships. This is akin to the false logic that “Whales are mammals. Whales live in the sea. Therefore, all mammals live in the sea.”

This is correct, but I actually think the same point could be made about her conclusion about nice guys too. Some nice guys are guilty of all the vices pointed out, but not all of them, as those vices certainly aren’t what defines them as a nice guy anyway. Also, I think that plenty of people who aren’t “nice guys” have these vices too.

But sure, I think that nice guys are particularly prone to a lot of these flaws. Oversensitivity and insecurity are the two that I think are the most likely to plague a nice guy. I’m guilty of them.

As far as being too sensitive goes, that’s related to all the things I was saying about how a genuine nice guy will be fascinated about right and wrong. They will always be trying to hold themselves to high standards, so sometimes when other people don’t treat them as thoughtfully, it hurts. I very, very often feel like I care more about others than they care about me. I get by with this by telling myself to be happy for what they do give me, telling myself not to make comparisons, and reminding myself that I’m not entitled to anything. But every time I fly home and desperately try to see people and they don’t seem to be trying as hard to see me, it sucks. Every time I lend somebody money and let them forget about it, and then when they spot me a dollar and talk about how I owe them, it sucks. I can go on and on.

If you want to, you can just call me a pushover for some of these things. There’s certainly some truth to that, but only because the amount I care for people isn’t reciprocated. If they cared about me the way I cared about them, and if they treated me the way I treated them, then those things wouldn’t happen and nobody would think to call me a pushover. A better criticism would be to say that I’m naive for setting myself up to be disappointed this and unintelligent for letting it happen over and over.

As for insecurity, sure, I’ve got that too. I like myself, even if I think I’m full of flaws. I’m a worrier, but I’m confident in my skills and expertise in some fields (but I certainly don’t think I’m the best in the world at anything, although I still do have some Olympic dreams when it comes to archery, heh). I tend to think too much about things and give negative meanings to things that are actually probably meaningless, but my reflex whenever I’m confronted with any challenge is to identify the different problems that compose it and try to figure out the different logical solutions for them, so I don’t ever curl up and hide.

So sure. I have insecurities. Maybe if I really opened myself up to somebody and talked about them, they would conclude that I have an unhealthy amount of insecurity. But you know what else a lot of nice guys have? Self-discipline. Everybody prides themselves on different things, and for me, one of them is my self-discipline. I can control my composure, and sometimes when I want to do something but am feeling too shy to do it, I’ll swallow hard and just do it. Maybe it’ll take some time to convert courage into action, but if I ever recognize that I’m not doing something because I’m afraid or insecure, then I’ll change my very mentality to help me do whatever it is that I want do it. I just pretend that I’m not afraid of or insecure about whatever it is, and I can usually get so “into character” that it becomes the truth. Another trick I have is to contemplate how irrational the fear or insecurity is.

The paper I read seems to describe nice guys as annoying, whiny, emotionally volatile, clingy, dependent losers incapable of facing any of their problems or the real world itself. Like I said before, I think that this characterization is only true for some nice guys, just like I think it’s true for some people who aren’t nice guys. It’s a weak correlation.

Everybody has flaws, and having stereotypical whiny wussy flaws isn’t what defines somebody as a nice guy.

After hours of arguing and explaining my situation (in short, I paid for CS4 and they never sent it to me), Apple apologized and will be sending me a copy with two-day shipping. And I don’t have to pay for any of this since the whole point is that they owed it to me from October.

I told my story to The Consumerist, and they liked it enough that they put it on their front page. You can read it here. Maybe I’ll inspire some other people!

So it’s over. It’s finally over. Apple relented and did the right thing. Adobe, however, is still a bunch of jerks as far as I’m concerned. Shame on them.

Oh, and special thanks to my roommate Ben for keeping me pepped and focused when I was starting to feel too exasperated to go on.

That’s not exactly what calendars were designed for though, and I don’t think I’d ever want to live according to a productivity dogma like some people choose to.

That said, there are programs that are designed specifically to make time management easier. They’re like self-organizing to-do lists, and the most important thing about them is that they have to save you more effort than you would spend without them, or else there’s no point. They must be mindlessly simple, trivially fast to use, and they have to actually be helpful even for the most casual users.

In short, they should enable people to be lazier without anybody else noticing. It’s as much about effort management as it is about time management if you ask me.

Since I enjoy experimenting with new programs, I’ve decided to demo several such programs. Here’s what I’ll be looking at:

1. OmniFocus (Mac, iPhone) – The old guard, beloved by many and famously used by lots of professionals.
2. Things (Mac, iPhone) – The most famous challenger to OmniFocus, which also has a huge following.
3. Process (Mac) – Another nice looking commercially developed task manager made famous by appearing on MacHeist. 
4. The Hit List (Mac) – This one is so new, it’s not even out yet technically. You’ll have to use the beta for now. But it’s starting to get some attention.
5. Inbox (Mac) – This product is clearly designed with the whole GTD method in mind, not just the to-do list part. And interestingly, it’s also clearly inspired a little bit by iTunes.
6. Remember The Milk (Windows, Mac, Linux, iPhone, Web) – It’s a web site, but it uses Google Gears to work by itself offline, and they also have an actual iPhone app.
7. Listo (Windows, Mac, Linux) – A portable free and open source endeavor by a small team of friends, with an iPhone app promised for the future.
8. Evernote (Windows, Mac, iPhone, Windows Mobile) – Not designed specifically for task management, but also can do much more and is very easy to use for that purpose anyway.

If there are any more worth considering, then let me know and I’ll add it. The requirements are that it has to work offline as a standalone program, and it has to be Mac friendly (or if it’s made for Unix or Linux, that’s okay as long as it’s available through Fink or easily compiled from source on a Mac).

I’ll let you know what I think after playing around with them. In the meantime, play around with them yourself, and then we’ll be able to compare our conclusions later.

Anyway, my first class was Photography for Graphic Designers. To be honest, photography never really grabbed my interest too much. I realize that most art that us silly humans make, regardless of the type, is boring, dumb, or overrated. That’s why it’s hard to be a good artist. However, I’ve always felt like the ratio of good work to bad work is worse in the field of photography than most other art forms. It’s not that super awesome photography doesn’t exist though. The professor seemed pretty cool though, so I’m hoping that I’ll be exposed more to the kind of stuff that I like instead of the dull kind of work that I’ve seen in almost every gallery I’ve been to.

Of course, the first class was more of an introduction. For most of the first hour, she just told us a bit about herself and about how having a solid understanding of photography would benefit us as graphic designers. The rest of the class, she taught us about the various things to look for in a camera since obviously we’d be needing to buy a good camera.

It went well. After class, I came back and took a nap since I’d gotten myself all worked up about my first class. After that, I grabbed dinner, met up with Katie and her friends, and watched Saw III.

Not a bad first day. Now I just need to start looking at cameras and printers.

Hope all of your first days at school went well!

My dorm’s check-in is on August 27th, but we’re heading up a day early. So that’s actually just ten days away.

I’m going to miss my family, friends, and my amazing dog Sparky, but I’ve been waiting to go to college for my whole life and already had to delay it a year because of my health.

It’s almost time. I can hardly wait.